"No scribe is yet on board to write, and Platinum Dunes plans to be meticulous with the remake, knowing it has been entrusted with a jewel from the Paramount library."
While you're at it, why don't you just meticulously take a dump on my head? Or meticulously run my grandmother over with a pick-up truck, rolling back and forth over her for good, meticulous measure?
What bothers me here, beside the obvious fact that this is even happening, is that they're trying to act as if they have noble intentions, or even any concern for the original. Noble intentions would be cleaning up Polanski's film and re-releasing it. Know what I'd give to see the original on the big screen? A kidney, that's what. No, all they want to do is say, "Golly, we're so fortunate, thanks for allowing us the right to make money without having to think up anything new. I mean, it's sorta new, if we add a new ending where Rosemary escapes into the woods and raises the baby herself away from those horrible people, right? Wouldn't that be "shocking"? It puts a whole new feminist post-feminist post-post-modern spin on it, yeah! We're awesome!"
Gag.
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6 comments:
You know what, instead of remaking this, why didn't they tackle the sequel, "The Son of Rosemary"? It was a fantastic read and would have made a good film, and Mia Farrow could have once more been Rosemary (age appropriately)- of course, if you've read the book, filming the ending would have been tricky.
I predict that this remake is going to cause Ruth Gordon to rise from the grave and seek vengeance on all involved!
I actually just bought Son of Rosemary last week, Pax. Once I finish the book I'm currently reading I'll be popping that sucker open. Have you (or anyone reading this for that matter) ever seen Look What's Happened To Rosemary's Baby, the TV movie sequel starring Patty Duke (!) as Rosemary with Ruth Gordon reprising Minnie from 1976? I'd kill to get my hands on a copy of that.
I wish I knew voodoo just for this occasion, so I could make your Ruth Gordon wishes come true.
Meanwhile, I just read that Platinum Dunes is also remaking The Birds. So... I can't even think of anything witty to say about that.
ja,
I recall watching Look What's Happened... it was pretty bad. I think Patty Duke played Rosemary and maybe even Tina Louise was in it.
I hope you enjoy S.O.R., I read it almost ten years ago when it was first published and if I am not mistaken Ira Levin dedicated it to Mia.
Holy crap, it had never occurred to me that they could redo the ending of this movie. I mean, Michael Bay's directing, of course they will. And Komeda's score is going to be blasphemed by some Hans Zimmer bombast. And they're going to cast Jessica Alba and Ryan Reynolds and, and...this is the most horrible idea that Hollywood has had since J. Lo and Ben Affleck floated the idea of a Casablanca remake (I still have nightmares). Is there a petition we can sign or something? Can't Polanski or Mia sue or something?
Remakes are bound to happen in this industry, which has been creatively bankrupt for years. The good thing is that they actually admit that it's a remake.
But they are going to have to change the movie a lot if they want people in the theater. The original was... let me put this delicately, a bit on the slow side (OK, a major understatement, but still).
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