Looking at these pictures this morning I'm realizing that I never reviewed Pompeii! I mean, really though, what is there to review - it's a dumb movie that manages to rip off an astonishing number of other movies as it cobbles together a narrative... and yet because I am me and I'm sort of incapable of hating a disaster movie of any kind, I still kind enjoyed myself.
Pompeii fits every Tab A into every Slot B - there's even a politician who won't take the crisis seriously because he's got tourism to worry about! - and half-heartedly at best, but was I not entertained? I was kinda entertained. How much of that entertainment you can chalk up to Kit's little skirts and his astonishingly queer relationship with Adewale's character (they spend all night laying in their bunks beside each other going on and on about how they're happily going to stick something inside of the other one) I'll let you work out. (Psst, it's 93% of it. Then there's 6% for Keifer Sutherland's fancy-pants accent, and the left-over 1% is for lava balls. I love lava balls!!!)
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